2014 and all that

On December 31^st 2013, I decided to try and blog my way through the coming year. Well, it sort of happened. In total 96 blog posts were achieved. There were a couple of month-long gaps in there when life got in the way but I'm actually quite proud that I managed quite as much as I did.

And I've decided to continue with the blog for the time-being anyway. Not least because on four months there will be a general election to get annoyed about. But I find it quite enjoyable to put finger to keyboard. A question I get asked quite often is ‘why?’. Why put stuff out there and let the world see it all? Why bother with things like Twitter? I'm not sure I have a great answer really. I enjoy it. I self-censor enough to ensure that I won’t share things that affect other people and which they might not want to be shared, and to ensure I don’t put anything out there that could be career-limiting. But other than that, this is no different to keeping a diary – just one that I let anybody read. I think that the knowledge that I am writing for an audience does prevent there being too much introspection, but it still has that cathartic effect.

So how has the year gone? Well – I've pulled up one of the early posts from 2014 and taken some of the headings from that – seems as good an idea as anything else.

Music - performance

Voxcetera continued to be a great source of pride for me – performing as I did at St Sepulchre in March, and then on tour in Edinburgh, before a ’home’ fixture in October and then a wonderful Christmas concert. This year promises a concert at St Martin’s in the Fields, and then Dublin.

But I also managed to sing in a Prom for the first time – with the Rachmaninov Choral Symphony (Crouch End Festival Chorus) being one of the most demanding pieces of music I have ever encountered. The sense of achievement was overwhelming.

Adding to that a Verdi Requiem, a (second) Mozart one, and six Albert Hall Christmas gigs (plus one at Birmingham Symphony Hall) made for a full year. And that is without adding in my involvement with Balham Ukulele Society – something I did not see in the tea leaves when looking ahead.

All the musical things I do have in common the opportunity to spend time with groups of people, from all walks of life, who are friendly, and who make my life a better place. I am grateful for all of them.

Music - In the audience

Two main words. Kate Bush. A dream fulfilled. But also Folk by the Oak – Richard Thompson, Seth Lakeman, and Keston Cobblers Club among others. James Taylor at the Albert Hall, Difford and Tilbrook at the Union Chapel and Chas’n’ Dave.

Add that to a range of smaller gigs, from solo guitarists to chamber and full choirs, and big bands, and it has been a busy year. I’d lost the habit of going to gigs and have gradually built it back up again. I am sure there will be more in 2015.

Holidays

Life got in the way a bit. The need to practice for a prom, and move house, mean that I didn't clock up the Air Miles this year. Mixed feelings about this. I don’t feel that I wasted my holiday entitlement, in that I look back and can see that I did plenty. But it would be nice to get away a little bit more in 2015. Pretty sure that the kids won’t want to come, so I can look to some more grown-up destinations.

Books

I've kept this one going – with a lot of Kindle stuff. Quite a bit of it has been fairly old and cheap sci-fi, but I've also read a bit of travel and some proper fiction. And I've read quite a lot of economics and social science-y stuff. But Thomas Piketty – just not had the drive to read him yet.

Media do overlap of course – I continue to be a great consumer of podcasts (one of the benefits of being a regular user of public transport). And I would heartily recommend Freakonomics, Planet Money, This American Life, No Such Thing as a Fish (the QI podcast) and Reply All. I greatly enjoyed ‘Serial’ too. Yes it is voyeuristic, and at times uncomfortable, but did have me on the edge of my seat – and we are all allowed one or two guilty pleasures, aren't we?

Work

I look back and (quoting directly from last year’s blog) ‘I do find myself thinking – worrying really, that I'm not sure I can, or want to, go at this pace for too much longer’. Wow. I think the pace has increased considerably. I have coped. In fact better than that, I feel more positive about my ability to do the job than I did then. I think that last year’s anxieties were a part of some more general malaise going on in my life, and that by correcting things elsewhere I had more reserves to devote to work. Of course, now that I look back I wonder whether I am pushing things too hard – just because I don’t see a problem at the moment doesn't mean I am not storing up issues. I'm currently very happy with what I do, but I suspect I should at least start to think about longer-term future options and prospects during the next year.

Health

THE major success story of 2014 for me. I managed to lose 30 pounds in the period from May/June to September. I have managed to put about 5 of them back on over Christmas, but am disgusted enough with myself over that to ensure they will not be sticking around. I found a level of will power I really didn't think I had, and (no surprise) that all you need to do is eat in a controlled way and do lots of exercise and it all comes good. Which makes me feel all the more stupid about the decade-long search for miracle ways of achieving it.

While dieting, I went almost entirely veggie for a couple of months. I've not stuck to that since I hit my target weight, but am eating much less meat that I have ever done – and I feel a lot better for it. At home, I could definitely do the veggie thing 100% of the time – it’s going out that kills it. Particularly it was three days away with work and the third consecutive mushroom risotto as the only choice on the menu that made me yearn for flesh. Does this go down as a fail? No. Because over all I am much much healthier. I have achieved something I knew I need and wanted to, but I think never really thought I would get to with weight etc. It would be better for me and the planet if I ate no meat, but eating it on a less frequent basis isn't a disaster for either.

Life

Big, big changes. Causing a lot of stress to me and to those around me (thank you to all those who gave me such support during what could have been a much trickier period without you). But I finally moved away from a situation that wasn't making me happy (and wasn't making anyone else happy either). With some time now elapsed between then and now, I know that I feel much better (and worry a little about where I would have been heading if I hadn't made the move – I think it would have been a pretty dark place). I've managed to keep what I valued most - my kids and the relationship I continue to have with them – whilst becoming (I hope) a much more balanced and centred individual.

So, there we go. Overall score? A few misses, a few definite hits, quite a few unexpected and unforeseen. A year of major change, and I feel very positive about it and about the future. So I have to put it down as a pretty good year. Of course, I now need to think about what challenges 2015 holds, and what I want to change or continue. More on that in future posts.

Standing at a crossroads

I think it took until Thursday night for me to come down from my post-Kate Bush blissed-out state, but that was only because I was having a fairly major work nightmare – and not of the sleeping kind. Not going to go into detail but it brought me crashing back to earth. Shame, because I was having a lovely night, too.

I tried with some success to rekindle the feeling this morning. In my review I suggested KB’s voice was as good as it had been when she first recorded Hounds of Love. I’ve changed my mind on re-listening – it’s better. It had a depth and control on Wednesday beyond that on the recording.

But that’s enough KB – except to say I feel so privileged to have seen her.

Today, as well as my usual walk and gym trips I went to see a free concert in my local (100 yds away) church – St Mary’s. This was the Metier Ensemble – a young trio (piano cello and flute) who were excellent. It’s a bit of a shame only 50 people were there – the concert deserved better than that.

And then tonight I've been timekeeping at a swimming gala, at the new Streatham Pool. A facility where it seems they have tried to save money by making the swimming pool double as a sauna. Too darn hot I’m afraid.

I’ve been watching the post-referendum fall-out with a horrible sense of predictability. Very pleased (see past blogs) about the result, but who’d have thought that exactly what Devo Max means or necessitates would give rise to a row?

I think it was always going to mean trouble for the three main party leaders to announce, presidentially, a major change to the powers of parliament without consulting parliament. And the lines of debate are very predictable, and actually quite understandable.

Unless the Civil Service has been working on this for the last two years, doing everything from scratch by May seems reckless – it simply needs more thought (so a point to Labour there). But to give power to Scotland without a guarantee of changes in Westminster is also unacceptable (a point to the Tories). Mr Clegg – you don’t get any points, because you’ve not said what you think.

And thanks to parliamentary sovereignty, this parliament can’t bind the next. So Cameron sees the danger that an incoming Labour-led government will simply fail to implement the one logical solution which is (f**k, I hate to agree with Fat Dave) English Votes on English issues. Or at least no Scottish votes on them.

So where does this leave us? Cameron can’t guarantee being in power in June, so will want to get the Westlothian question sorted by then. Can he force it through? Will the SNP etc support if the option is delaying for a longer period? Will he avoid it being a total dog’s breakfast due to failing to prepare properly?

You may recall pre-referendum I called for devolution to a lower level than just England, and it is pleasing that many politicians obviously read my blog and have joined that cause at my calling(!) But I hope this doesn’t end up with us going back to regional assemblies and elected police commissioner-type things, with all the consequent cost. Let’s use the institutions we have and let them do more.

If there are lessons to learn from #indyref the top two are:

1. If people feel politics matters, they can get energised about it – so we need to get people to feel parliament matters, or that they can make a difference
2. (A prospective lesson) – don’t promise what you can’t deliver unless you want to unleash a whirlwind – either of open Scottish rebellion or it seems open English rebellion.

This country is like the hooker who used to* work Tooting Common – it spends most of its time standing at a crossroads. But this is a real inflexion point. We could build on the Scottish enthusiasm and create a newly engaged political system to last the rest of my lifetime. Or we could give people another reason (which they don’t really need to be honest) to be cynical about failed promises etc. And that is extremely dangerous.

People of my generation – maybe even of my parents – are now so distanced from real political instability that we think it’s not going to happen. This is complacent, and I believe it is wrong. This country runs a real risk of proper civil strife – not a week of riots around London. My children’s generation faces a crap job market, rising debt, unaffordable housing, and a diminishing benefits system. There’s not a lot to be hopeful about for a twenty-something with a student loan and a call-centre McJob.

These are the conditions in which revolutions happen. They happen for many reasons, but a key one is because the people do not believe there is any prospect of the system as it is delivering change. So that one the character emerges to lead the people they will rise behind him/her.

You may think I’m being a fantasist here – and maybe I am. But what we cannot do is take for granted that ‘the people’ will continue to take the same old sh*t indefinitely. And, even if I am wrong and they in fact will, WHY THE HELL SHOULD THEY??

So come on Fat Dave, Useless Ed and Slimy Nick. Between you, sort it out. You may be relieved that you’ve not gone down as the leaders who destroyed the union (because Labour must take a lot of the blame for not carrying the Union vote, especially in Glasgow), but you are by no means out of the woods yet!

  

*She may still – that is something I know very little about!

Little Light, Shining.

I've sort of kept it quiet, but I was lucky enough to go and see Kate Bush at the Hammersmith Apollo last night.

This is not a full blow-by-blow review. If you want one of those, perhaps have a look at Tracey Thorn’s for the New Statesman – she says it better than I ever could.

Row J it said on the ticket – ten rows back – that had to be good. But the stage was built out a little, so Row J was the fifth, with an amazing view so long as everyone in front of me wasn't standing to applaud. Which they were. Frequently. Not a problem; one of the benefits of being tall I guess.

The Band consisted of seven – with a drummer and separate full percussion set (needed if you think about the Hounds of Love album in particular). Plus five backing singers. And the first half dozen songs were a pretty standard rock gig – standing there delivering songs and doing little else.

This let us see what Kate Bush has become in her non-touring years. The voice. My god the voice. I dare say the songs have been re-pitched a little (maybe down a third for Hounds of Love – ish). But the power, and the ability to go from little-girl-lost vulnerable to rock diva. Opening with Lily (The Red Shoes) and running quite a lot from that mid-period around Hounds of Love to Aerial this really showed that she hasn't lost the knack. 

I wonder how you train for that? A three hour set where you are singing for most of it would tax most singers. Not, it seemed, our Kate. Plenty of water being drunk between songs, but pretty much spot on. As a song, "Running Up that Hill" is the stand-out, but as a performance, it had to be “King of the Mountain” from Aerial. Kate does Elvis very well indeed.

And then, nicely warmed up, we moved into what I still think of as the second “side” of Hounds of Love – the Ninth Wave concept piece. Heavy use of video, SFX, dance and actors to build the narrative which runs from the glorious “And Dream of Sheep” right through to “Hello Earth”. And before we knew it, it was the interval – an hour and forty minutes gone in a heartbeat.

Twenty minutes on and back in, and soon into the second concept / song-cycle. The “Sky of Honey” from Aerial. Without the Rolf Harris bit, although with her son playing the role of the painter. And he was good. His solo song, when KB went off for a breather, was well received, but was a bit like the drummer’s solo at a prog rock gig. If I had a watch on, that would have been the only time in the show I would have been tempted to glance at it.

Lots of use of bird imagery – drawing on the singing/come birdsong that litters the studio album, with puppetry and digital effects also. I felt it was a much heavier sound than in the studio. (And having listened again this morning to the CD, I was right about this). In particular, "Sunset", which is a pretty and gentle song started off as what I would call “dirty funk” before morphing into full-on flamenco. God, it was good.

The band gave its bows, and then Kate retunred to the theme of cherubim to deliver "Among Angels" from “50 Words for Snow”. Solo at the piano, as fragile as tissue paper. And then closing with Cloudbusting. “What made it special made it dangerous” indeed.

KB seemed genuinely overcome by the audience reception. I can’t believe that our night gave her more than every other one, but for a woman who clearly was least at her ease when talking and not lost in the song, it seems that the validation from her fans still takes her breath away.

I was I think eleven last time KB toured. At 35 year intervals, I doubt I’ll make the next one. Part of me thinks it will be lovely if this is a complete one-off – and I was one of the 70,000-ish people to see it. I’d maybe feel a little cheated if next year she does 60 dates at a theatre near you for £50 a head. But most of me thinks this is something that should be shared widely, and that I’d be there sitting alongside you if that happens.

To close, I’d make two points. Famously “the KB Foundation” had requested that no-one filmed or took photos – and as far as I could see, no-one did – such is the respect that fans have for the lady.

Secondly, everyone seemed to leave the gig smiling, and perhaps shaking their head a little in wonderment. And, you know what? I'm still smiling now.

And Gravity wants to bring me down...

This may be my last blog.

No, it's OK. I'm not planning to quit writing just yet. But tomorrow morning I have to get on a perilously small aeroplane and fly to Guernsey, and then Wednesday I have to fly back. We're talking about the sort of tiny little aircraft - with all the substance of a 70's Datsun that looks like it will be torn apart by the lightest gust of wind.

Mr Boeing reputedly said when asked why he chose to fly in a four-engined plane "because there are no eight engined planes." and this pretty much summarises my view on flying - the bigger the better. Little planes where they have to balance the passenger load by weight are unnecessary.

But my options for dealing with this are limited. Someone kindly suggested that in the spirit of this classic, I could chug a couple of whiskies before I got on the plane - but that's not really me. And I don't have any tranquillisers, so it will be eyes closed and take a firm hold of the arm rests.

Of course, as was also pointed out to me, it could get foggy and I could get stuck in Guernsey - which feels like a different sort of terror - you worry about them starting to sing "Summer is icumen in" and burn things.

In other news, I've hit my target weight! I hit it last Wednesday and have been at it since. These means several things:

1. that I have lost over 15 kg since Easter
2. that I feel really good about myself as a result
3. that (my app tells me) I can now happily eat an extra 500 calories a day over what I have been living on. And this is odd, because I don't know quite what to have. A Starbucks muffin every morning probably isn't ideal, but I can't eat another 5 bananas either.

I've still got some toning up to do - not major but a bit, and I really miss it when I don't go to the gym so that will all continue. And the longer term challenge is to get this stabilised and permanent. So I shall be watching my weight like a hawk - and if you think I am slipping, please intervene.

So with that hopefully done, I'll need to find something else to talk to you about. Suspect it is not going to be the royal baby - I feel so sorry for that poor woman and the scrutiny she is permanently under so I shall say no more unless they wish to name it after me.

And I've been threatened with death if I just keep going on about Kate Bush for the next 9 days and 3 hours. And I think they meant it.

So, instead I'm going to write a couple of blogs about Scottish independence. I am Scottish you see - lived the first fourteen months of my life in Edinburgh, so I will be "considered a citizen" by a future independent Scotland. And could sponsor my kids to be one too. Sounds like something worth exploring, at least in blog form. And it may presage a turn back to the longer-term political agenda of some blogs previously, you never know.

Guess Who's Back?

... back again.

You’ll have noted the three week gap, which has pretty much coincided with me being on holiday. I took the decision that, given my working life involves a lot of time looking at a computer screen, my holiday shouldn't. So I haven’t. Just checked the email each day, largely to control the inflow of stuff.

So, what to tell you?

I've had a wonderful break. I’ve caught up with a few friends, and also visited my parents. I've caught up with the kids – always it seems in ones and twos, but they are so busy doing their own stuff. And in my brief offspring-related detour, I was delighted by middle son’s frankly stellar GCSE results – he has learned a great lesson that hard work brings results. I learned that lesson at age 40.

Health? Well. I set myself what with my work head on I would call a stretch goal – if everything went well then one day I might get there. And I am now only 2.5Kg* off it. That means I have since Easter now lost 30 pounds^. Over the holiday, with the exception of two days at my parents, I have walked at least four miles every day (except today because of the rain) and gone to the gym every day except one. And I have eaten healthily. I am absolutely ecstatic with my achievement – my stretch goal looks possible for September.

Which meant I had to buy some new clothes. Not my favourite experience, but feels good to have reduced the size that much. Of course (up pops the negative part of Brain) it’s the keeping it off that is difficult. To which I say frankly “bollocks”, let’s see in six months’ time.

Music? I am loving my Ukulele playing with Balham Ukulele Society. It’s fun, and low pressure, but still something to work at. More seriously, I sang at the Proms on Monday 18^th – the Rachmaninov Choral Symphony – “The Bells”. Wow. What a choir, what an orchestra, what a conductor, what a reception. It was on Radio 3 and is still on IPlayer. The music may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but it was such an experience. Hard work. Really hard work, but certainly worth it.

So, that’s the catch-up download. Not a mention of Kate Bush (23 days and counting and the tickets have arrived) or Peter Capaldi’s Doctor Who (though I want a coat like that). And no mention of the stuff I have read over the break – I’ll give you all that lot over the coming weeks.

It’s great to have been away, but it’s just as lovely to come back.

* I’ve decided to go metric

^ It didn’t last – I can only think in imperial measures

Somewhere in between

There is going to be a gap in my blog I'm afraid.

"Yes", you point out, "it started a week ago...". Well, so it did, Dear Reader. It's just that (as well as minor details like a gig at the Albert Hall tomorrow) I have something really major that has cropped up and I have to deal with it. And given that I need to work - well I need to keep getting paid, and intend to honour all my commitments to various choirs and causes if at all possible, something has to give.

And that something is the blog.

I very much hope that before the end of the month normal service can be resumed. And what is happening might give me a few new things to talk about - if I can - not sure. But for now I'm going to tie off a few posts from the year where I have left things hanging with some bullets below - and say auf wiedersehen.

1. I'm still not eating meat. Had a bit of fish, especially at the start, but that's reducing now. Don't feel much different physically (but feeling no worse is good) but feel happy that this is right for me now.
2. I blogged earlier on this year about dieting. That did not go well, until the last couple of weeks, which have seen a bit of a change, so I'l have to hold that one for now and see. 
3. Cigarettes. Clearly good to have stopped, but I still want one. If you're offering?
4. So glad to see the UKIP bandwagon has at least stopped speeding up following the by-election result. I do feel sorry for the Libdems, because I don't think they really had a choice about the coalition, but there you go. I'm sure Nick Clegg will relish his peerage in May 2015.
5. Not exactly a Green breakthrough - but not a collapse either. 3 MEPs (up from 2)
6. Three months until Kate Bush (in tribute to whom this post was named)!
7. Before that, Chas 'n' Dave on 21st June! 
8. I have lost count of the times and ways in which music has kept me sane, who I want to be etc. It matters.

Wow. Unbelievable...

Since my last blog the greatest (some might say only) issue to face humanity has been whether we would get any tickets to see Kate Bush at her residency at the Apollo later this year.

You have to approach these things with trepidation. Many of my generation had *that* poster on their walls (if you are too young to remember 1979, ask your father) and I grew up in the period that spans Kate's first five albums, So it's a major part of my early teens - from the genuine (although I am sure expressed differently) WTF at "Wuthering Heights" to seeing the "Cloudbusting" short with Donald Sutherland as a support to "Back to the Future" on an early, and I suspect spectacularly unsuccessful, date. (I was more interested in the fact that Challenger had been lost that day - she wasn't).

So having missed Kate's previous live shows, on the reasonable grounds that I was 11 and lived 300 miles away, I have to see these ones, don't I? "Oh, but", says Nagging Voice Of Gloom, "she must be 55 now. Ain't going to be doing that much of the Wuthering Heights cartwheels now, is she?"

Maybe so, NVOG, but there are some things that you have to do.  Last year's Stones in Hyde Park may have shown that Mick Jagger has kept himself in trim, but he wasn't the be-tunic'd poet of 1969. And the Stones are pretty much a tribute band to themselves nowadays. Last decent track/album? Fuck knows frankly because most people listen to the cheap Greatest Hits CDs.

Kate Bush has always been a show-person. OK, one who doesn't tour, but she understands the need for persona and reinvention - in the same way as Madonna has done for the last thirty years. Those of us who remember her last flirtation with the charts - King of the Mountain from Aerial - on which she does a pretty good Elvis impression. (Evens at the moment on whether Rolf Harris will be reprising his role on some of the bits from that album.) So whatever she is, and isn't, she is going to be interesting.

And so with trepidation I entered the buying frenzy on Friday, and emerged successful. Two tickets. Row J of the stalls. Central. I am excited already and there is still five and a half months to go.

Apologies to those expecting a blog that was either political as I promised, or not solely about Kate Bush. Normal service will be resumed in due course - though not necessarily until October ;-)